Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
