So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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