he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
