We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
