I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
