i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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