Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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