Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
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