i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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