If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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