just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
