It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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