we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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