I'm drive I can fine osifer
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
