I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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