fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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