even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
