Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
