So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My liver is preforming stress tests.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
