We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm just crazy horny about you
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
