Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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