I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
