That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
