She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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