I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
