just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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