speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
