fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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