No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
it's like heaven, but drunker
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
