I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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