4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize