oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
