using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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