I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
