Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I don't deserve a penis
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Randomize
