what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
