is this the sara with the beer cane?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize