did you get engaged???
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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