Who did Billy Mays play for?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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