No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize
