Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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