I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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