Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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