woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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