Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
