It's Friday. Sex?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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