so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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