It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
