yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize