Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
