season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
